World's First Scratching Fatality

Seriously, has anyone ever died from scratching themselves to death? I think I need to do some research on the subject because if no one has, I just might be the first. I swear, I can't stop! I know I should. I see the welts on my skin and I know scratching them will only make it worse. The problem is they itch so bad I really don't give a shit! I have no idea why I have hives but I do and they are hell. I went to the doctor and guess what she said? "I don't know what could be causing this". Like I do. Damn, I'm so glad I needed to pay her to tell me that she has no idea what is wrong with me. Actually, I am happy to pay her because she is the one who, even though she has no idea what is wrong with me, was able to prescribe drugs. I don't care what anybody says about drugs if they can stop the itching they are freakin' cool in my book. At least she referred me to someone who might be able to tell me what is wrong - in three weeks! Hopefully I won't have to scratch my way through that time. That would not be any fun and I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have any skin left to treat by then anyway. I never had allergies as a child. Or maybe I did, but my parents never admitted it. I have slowly been acquiring them as I get older. After my second child I became allergic to every preservative known to man. Okay, that is a slight exaggeration but not by much. I'm allergic to pretty much every soap and cosmetic and shampoo. I touched a bottle of hand soap in the store the other day and my finger actually started burning. Fun, eh? Then, after I had Eddie, they finally put me on seasonal allergy medication because I was miserable pretty much all of the time. Sneezing, coughing, itchy eyes, the works! That really helps, I didn't realize I haven't been able to breathe for the last fifteen years. Breathing is a good thing. Then, last summer, I was stung by a bee and ended up with a whole body reaction that lasted a couple of days, which is what I figured this was until it lasted five days and portions of my body are so thoroughly scratched I'm not sure if they will ever recover. So, hopefully, I can stay unswollen and breathing for the next three weeks so that I can find out what is causing my body to reject it's own skin this time. Isn't life fun? You never know what it is going to throw at you and it usually does so at the most inopportune times. Like any time would be a good time for a horrible allergic reaction, I'm just saying, now is not a good time. Oh well, at least I could stop itching long enough to write this. Maybe that medicine is actually working! I'll let you know if I gnaw off my fingers while I sleep, although I'm not sure how...

I took Eddie to her first soccer practice of the year today. We didn't know where her team was so we just started walking around checking all of the teams. Of course we went the wrong way and asked six different teams before we found ours. Needless to say Ed was not happy with me. I've said many times in the past that I'm not the sharpest crayon in the box. I paid for it again because by the time we got there they had already started practice and Eddie had decided that they all knew each other and she was the one left out. She also informed me that she didn't like the fact that she couldn't be on the same team as last year. The coach came up to her and she ran away crying and hid behind a tree. It took me more than half of the practice to coax her back and get her to participate. She had every excuse in the book. She said didn't know anybody. I told her that no one knew anybody because it was a new team. She told me she had to have her pink soccer ball, so, sucker that I am, went back to the car and got her the pink ball. She still didn't want to go practice. I got her to at least go over to where they were and she came running back saying they wouldn't let her play with her pink ball. I said just go over there, they will let you play with your ball. She said she would go if I came with her. So, I went and not even three seconds after I sat down she came running over yet again and said that she had missed her turn and they were starting over. I told her if she hadn't left the line they wouldn't have skipped her. Finally the coaches must have noticed that she was favoring the pink ball so when it was her turn they made sure she used it. From that drill on she was fine. She did everything they told her to and didn't complain once. She even shared the pink ball with all of the other kids. Gee, I wonder why she thinks she can always get what she wants? I can't imagine where she would have gotten an idea like that. At least she was finally playing and having fun. We'll have to see what happens when they tell her she can't play real games with the pink ball. This should be interesting! Who knows - maybe they will make pink soccer balls regulation before long. Stranger things have happened! Princess Eddie can be very persuasive.