Uneventful Life

I should be very excited because I am actually going out tonight, but I don't really care. I am not happy. Why can't I just get a goal in my sights and work towards it? I have a very hard time getting going and then keeping that momentum for more than a few days at a time. I mean just a few days ago, I was all gung-ho about moving forward and today, I feel like a lump of mud. I just want to sit here and ooze. I guess I should just tell myself this too shall past and I'm sure it will, but when do I get to have a time where I don't need something to pass? When can I actually, truly be happy for more than a day or two at a time? I sound like a basket case. I should have taken a course in life management while I was in school, cause my parents didn't prepare me for any of this. I didn't think it was going to be this hard. Isn't life supposed to be interesting and fun not boring and non eventful? I guess this is something I need to do myself, but I have tried. I have gone out and met new people and tried new things. I have completely changed my routines and aspirations and I'm still miserable. WTF?!? This time it is all me too, no one is sitting here yelling at me or telling me I didn't do something right, or complaining that I'm not fair. This is just me going through the motions of my meaningless life. I can't even get excited for things I really want to do. I feel I am a burden on everyone I know. Everyone is so busy, why aren't I? If I were, I wouldn't have hours and hours to sit and wonder why I'm just sitting here.